BIG BUDDHA TATTOO, FULLERTON

I got this tattoo centuries ago, done by my presumably outlaw biker buddy Jack, also known as Boneshaker. An all around talented guy, but things being what they were in those days, and his at-the-time amateur status, it didn't really have stayin' power.

Two funny things, though:

I was on, like, a second date with a girl and I told her I got it for her as a goof - she was not hip to my mirth and became instantly concerned that "it was too soon", which in turn colored my attitude toward the dumb broad. Permanently.

Two days later I went to my sister's and went swimming. As I was about to hit the water in a perfect dive, I heard my mother scream WHAT the HELL is THAT?!?!?!? Had to surface eventually, but at least she ultimately was able to deal.

So, as you can see, it has faded, possibly has some anatomy associated balance issues, And my wife's name (which was added on our 5th anniversary) is barely readable (I shoulda walked out the second I saw that he dotted the "I" in her name with a heart.) My old signature above the heart (it bears no resemblance to that now) actually cashed me a check once.


I had stopped in two or three parlors in the past to see why this fading happened and what could be done about it. The first two in Ingnoramusadelphia, PA shithole of the universe/birthplace of the US, where firstly some oaf that wouldn't be happy unless he was piercing an ampallang with automotive tools (sorry asshole, I don't want to stab anyone this week, keep working on that scowl) and secondly, a parlor run by a group of ladies who maybe should have invested in a "NO MEN" sign. Who knew? It wasn't like it was called "Amazon Man Death Society" or anything, but it was evident that because I had an "outie" (or front tail, if you will)  I was not welcome. If I'm over interpreting, perhaps it was their clipped angry responses to questions while having clenched fists that confused me.

But as I was waiting to get in to see a band in a fake punk craphole in Fullerton run by people who make East Coasters look like Eloi, I took a walk and ended up in Big Buddha Tattoo parlor where I had an in depth philosophical discussion of the merits of treating my blasted little scar as an artifact of a time gone by where if the tattoo needle wasn't touching bone ya weren't doing it right. They also told me that the technique of using a "pork chop", a piece of clear plastic with the design scratched in it in reverse, then filled with activated charcoal dust and applied to the anatomy, had only gone out of use a few years back. They then told me I could just email them my concept and they'd do it.





The angry robot maybe?

They showed me 15 year old tattoos that looked like they had been done yesterday, and told me that while they could both repair and obscure the tattoo that I should hold it in esteem because it was old and had a story. I've got clients in Fullerton and hopefully Huntington Beach, soon, and told them that I'd be back to do something.

The guy on the left below is Sam Ngo. If he will allow me to jest, next time I'm there, I'm gonna get up n'go and see him.

Cool Tool Library - Oakland, CA

I had a chance to visit Oakland Public Libary's TOOL lending library....yes, that's right, tools. Need an 11/16th spade bit (great for old school xmas light base holes- don't ask)? Break out your library card.... How about a half-round bastard file? Right this way. Stilson wrench? no problem. Spirit level? Yep. Can you cope with a coping saw? (for the record, I just listed those to be lingusitically clever) The rooms are well organized (by Ty, librarian in charge of the area - his favorite food? Thai.) in a vintage Carnegie Library building's rear entrance at the Temescal Branch.

Libraries are the last bastion of a true society here in the U.S.; everybody wants to support education, then bitches about the cost. We have little or no free college, we have no public health care, we underfund other non-commerce-based public works, but everybody, it seems to me observing people in libraries across the U.S. uses the library. It's the great independent study resource. Often they are underfunded, too, but the folks who run them still manage to provide solid reasonable frou-frou free (like that one?) lending services like this tool library, which ultimately serves the public at large well by facilitating repair and/or creation of.....whatever.

This tool library, (me opining again) is as mind-freeing of a concept as................unburned books!

And it turns out that there's several in the US. Many in the I-wish-I-lived-there Bay Area.

Speaking of burning and banning of books, here's a list of proposed tools that could do with some renaming to avoid being endangered by the book banning fascists:
Butt marker
ball-peen
dead-blow
Stud finders
Hand screw clamp
Mortar hoes
Float, rubber
Hoe (hula)
Furniture dolly
Grinders
Elec. snake-small
Nipple extractor
Tubing bender
Wrenches (internal pipe, plug, seating, slipknot, spud, stem, strap)

Just for the record: that's the zeitgeist puttin' those suggestive images in your heads - not me.

Just a few more: Citrus Labels !!

Unvarnished truth. The smell of a wet dog from the chemical bath the fruit was placed in. The domesday book open to the citrus page. The ever widening gyre whose center cannot hold. Rough beasts slouching towards Jerusalem. Allen Ginsburg farting at your table as you slice into your Christmas pork loin.

Yay!.... for California produce!





JK OK ? LOL BRB

Fruit Labels

A couple of years ago I was priviliged to view the Art of the Orange gallery at Los Angeles Public Library and got to view pristine examples of label art, with accompanying explanations of how the grade of the fruit was embedded in the imagery on the labels (like the King David above which meant grade "A" fruit)

I found (accidentally again looking for proposal imagery) this wonderful collection of images from Cratelabelsonline which has good sized images, and a large collection of the classic California and West Coast agricultural marketing images.

Check it out - you won't regret it.